by Amy Marienblaume | Instagram
Welcome back, witches! Thanks for joining me again, I am really looking forward to walking this path with you….hold onto your broomsticks!
Ignoring my Feelings: A Lifelong Practice
After telling you how much I like research in Chapter One, the second thing you need to know about me is that I am really good at ignoring my feelings. It’s a skill I spent decades mastering. Here is a conversation that regularly goes on in my head:
Inner Witch: Hey, um, so we’re feeling kind of bummed today, maybe we should…
Me: Oh look! The bathroom needs to be cleaned.
Inner Witch: So, we’re still feeling sad and we could really benefit from releasing some stuff…
Me: I should make some banana bread before these bananas go completely black. I DO love warm banana bread (especially toasted with butter. Side note: have you ever tried that?)
Inner Witch: Um, we’re still here…
Me: Yells “WHY AM I THE ONLY MEMBER OF THIS HOUSEHOLD WHO CAN BE BOTHERED TO PICK UP THEIR STUFF?” after finding what my husband (annoyingly) refers to as his “living room socks” shoved under the coffee table – again.
Inner Witch: Ok, you’re obviously not going to work through this so we’re going to force
you to pay attention to yourself. Here’s a headache, and we’ll throw in a side of nausea ‘cause these feelings need to come out… Enjoy!
Me: Aw, crap…
Sound familiar? I’m betting it does, because ignoring ourselves is an ability that we, as human beings, have been perfecting for generations.
Meeting my Inner Witch
After my inner witch made her reappearance, I knew that I had to find a way to connect to her again and harness the power I felt within myself. Section One of The New Witches Guide outlines five different ways you can connect with your inner witch; journaling, checking in with yourself, developing a mind/body practice, finding community, and by creating (the dictionary got it wrong – witchcraft should be a verb, not a noun).
As you can guess, some of these have been easier for me to implement than others. Likewise, I’m sure that you will find some that are a better fit for you. Regardless, all are worthy of your time as you explore the best ways for you to connect with your inner witch.
Journaling and Meditation and Yoga – Oh My!
I have always had an aversion to journaling. When I thought about journaling, I saw myself as a tween, blatantly lying to my diary about the life I wanted to live as opposed to the life I was actually living (Hint: this will not help you). It has taken me time and considerable effort to find and maintain a practice of journaling that feels right for me. While I’d love to say that I rise with the sun to have coffee and journal with beautiful penmanship in a hand bound, leather covered, grimoire-style book, that would be an epic lie. I am not a morning person, my penmanship is not beautiful, and I don’t drink coffee. Ultimately, I found that an app is the best fit, and through its use, I have developed a daily, weekly, and monthly journal for myself. I built each one to focus on what is actually happening in my life, to chart the moon phases and how they’re affecting me, and to plan and reflect on my spell work and healing rituals – what was successful, what was not, and whether or not it helped me call forth my power and unleash my authentic inner witch. As much as I’m not a morning person, I do respond to some of my daily journal prompts before my day starts to help ground myself and set my intention. In the evening I complete the rest – sometimes all of the prompts, and other times just a few, depending on what intuitively feels right and what part of myself needs my attention in that moment. Taking some time each week and month to reflect back helps me to better know and understand myself.
My mother taught me to meditate when I was young, and for this I will be forever grateful. She passed from this life when I was a teenager, and meditation is one of the ways I have been able to connect with her if I’m having an “I want my mom” kind of day. Like any other skill, it takes practice and time to craft. Know that clearing your mind is incredibly hard some days. Please, dear reader, be kind to yourself. If it’s just not working for you in that moment, it is okay to step away. Meditation is not something that will do you much good if you force it. Before I begin any meditation, I take a few minutes to get some fresh air and ground myself. This practice helps quiet my mind, connect with the earth, and clear away any energies that I’ve been holding onto or that have attached themselves to me. Guided meditations are a great place to start if you’re new to this, and they help me on the days when my mind is very busy. When my mind feels still, or when I’m asking my soul for specific guidance, timed meditations are a better fit. Both styles are valid and one is not better than the other.
Lastly, there is my beloved yoga. What I like most about yoga is that it is completely and utterly customizable to the amount of time you have, your physical ability in that moment, and every pose can be modified to make it accessible for yourself. Child’s pose with stacked fists brings me instant calm. It functions as an automatic reset button for my nervous system and returns me to my centre when life is hectic. Something about the pressure of my forehead resting against my fists while my hips are high in the air is so soothing. My boss found me found me in this pose in my office not long ago. I am continually grateful that we have such a supportive relationship, because she knew exactly what I was doing, and why I was doing it…might have been pretty awkward otherwise!
Putting it All Together: Building my Daily Practice
If there is one crucial lesson that I have learned throughout my intuitive development work, and by working through Part One of the Guide, it is that you cannot ignore your feelings and harness your power at the same time. I have found that when I don’t make time for my daily practice, my intuition is very superficial (by which I don’t mean that it’s vain. I mean that it doesn’t help me with my path of personal growth and calling forth my inner witch’s power). We all have to do the work and craft a daily practice that is right for ourselves, knowing that it might need change day-to-day.
Dearest witch, please give yourself some grace – one or all of these might be new skills for you and they take time to develop. Some days you might be able to spend a great deal of time connecting with your inner witch, and other days it’s only possible to muster 5 minutes of quiet time to check in with yourself. Remember that a witch is an authentic self and what’s important is that you honour yourself and do what feels right for that day.
You may have noticed that I haven’t dedicated any of this post to finding community or creating – for good reason, I promise you. Creating is something so personal and looks different for everyone. What calls to me has changed over the course of my life, and has included making music, dancing, and writing as of late (cue the birth of this series). When you find the creative outlet that is right for you, it will flourish and feed your soul – this I promise you. Finally, in next week’s entry, I will be addressing the subject of finding your witch community, among other things. Until then, witches, Blessed Be!
About the Author: Amy is a newly re-awakened witch living in South-Western Ontario. As a Scorpio sun, Pisces moon, and Scorpio rising, she can be found reading and recharging in the bath when she’s not chasing after her almost-five-year-old Leo son she is raising with her Sagittarius husband. Professionally, as a Human Resources Business Partner, Amy brings her magic into the office by guiding the rest of the team to build self-awareness, compassion, and empathy with the goal of creating a more harmonious and enchanted workplace. You can find her on Instagram at @thewakenedwitch, where she shares her journey into owning the identity of Witch.